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Wednesday, December 8, 2010

My Infertility Journey...a brief update

Somehow I haven't felt much like writing lately.  I've been busy, it's true, but I also haven't had a lot to say.  Life is moving forward, sometimes quickly and sometimes agonizingly slow...

We're homeschooling.  Barely.  We do our reading lesson and reading every day, but other than that I've been a slacker in that area.  I'm giving myself some grace here...he's 4 1/2 and already reading.  We're still ahead of the curve!

I'm trying to organize the house and get it cleaned.  I mean DEEP cleaned.  And ready for us to move this summer.  Which means I need to slowly start packing.

Did I mention JMonster went through a HUGE growth spurt and has outgrown a lot of his clothes?  So, not only are we doing a seasonal closet change, we have to go through every piece to figure out what still fits.  I despise doing this!

(Of course, I also have bursitis in my shoulder.  VERY painful.  VERY limiting!)

And CHRISTMAS is coming!  
I've been finishing the Shutterfly book I do every year.
I've been shopping.
Did I mention the Shutterfly book?
Which takes HOURS?

And in the midst of all of that, we're discussing whether we should try and get pregnant again.  We have 2 more frozen embryos, remember?  And I'm not getting any younger.  And no one has jumped up and shouted that they would be a surrogate for us (okay, 2 people did but both of them promptly got pregnant!).

So, we're discussing doing a transfer in the next couple of months.

But to do so we'd have to add maternity coverage to our health insurance.

Which would cost BIG bucks.

As would a transfer.

And what if it fails?

What if it SUCCEEDS?

What about my trip to HAWAII?

I need a vaca!

5 comments:

Texan Mama @ Who Put Me In Charge said...

Oh my gosh, honey. If I could hug you right now I would. You deserve something wonderful right away!

Susan Radulovacki said...

Sweet girl, I know how much you've wanted this next child to come. And how hard y'all have tried to make it happen. There's a great reason it hasn't -- and you'll meet him or her at some point. But for now, know that everyone who's made the journey you're on feels tremendous compassion for you. And we're all sending lots of hugs and many prayers your way as you try to discern what step to take next. XOXOXO!

Swizz said...

I sure hope this didn't sound like I was whining or complaining. I'm not, I promise!

I'm actually in a place where I feel content...for the most part. I trust that God has GOOD plans for me. I do! I just am curious as to what they are. :o)

JMonster is a HUGE blessing, and is enough. But we DO have 2 more embryos...so there IS that dilemma.

But I am okay. I am. And am reaching that point where I feel JOY. Real JOY.

I'm so glad I have friends like the 2 of you. God's blessings!

PJ said...

I'm thinking about you & praying for you! It's a hard decision and God will guide you ... (((hugs)))

Baloney said...

Not that you are really asking me, but here is what I have to say. As long as those embryos are there you will be asking yourself this very question. If you can, you should go ahead and try. Why postpone joy... or disappointment in favor of the uncertainty you feel about it now?
God has great plans for you, and you know this.
I know whatever you decide it will be the right thing for your family.